MZUNI GOSSIP

Of late the campus has been circulated with the so called new magazine “Mzuni Post” on which the new publications crew, headed by the infamous Director of Publications and Publicity, would want to capitalize upon and get undeserved fame by unwittingly attacking innocent people, Hamas inclusive. This article therefore serves to inform the whole Mzuni community the force that have driven these devilish and heathen beings by giving you the chance to know their other sides (for the two people, the Director of Publications and the Editor in Chief). The two of you, (hopefully you will come to read this precious piece of work) should know that mwaputa zachabe coz we spare nobody when compelled to do so, you have declared war and in war there are casualties on both sides, for sure you will bear more consequences than ourselves. Mind you this is only the beginning of the start

ON HAMAS

Hamas is a sovereign crew that is very peaceful and only responds when provoked, like this provocation, in the quest to defend ourselves, we will attack. For your own information, the crew possesses a lot of intelligentsia ranging from Philosophers, Theologians, Historians, Geographers, Linguists, Scientists and many others, this entails that it has a broader spectrum of information not only academic but on the campus as well. Let us make it clear here that we are not involved in Utsoki as falsefully presented in the Mzuni post

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DIRECTOR OF PUBLICATIONS AND PUBLICITY

He produced a condom instead of a meal coupon at Chancellor College cafeteria during the MUTAG/ Writers Forum trip

Adaphulitsa mkazi kwawo, akuti mwangozi, as if there are no Zishango and Manyuchi, as if not a university student worth the name

Adalumidwa mkono ndi a girl (Rhoda) as the girl was attempting to defend herself when the director attempted to rape her (he deserves expulsion) izi ndi zenizeni.

He is fond of kugwa mchikondi mombwambwana kapena kuti modedeluka.

He wanted to commit suicide when he was unceremoniously dumped by a Form one pupil from Luwinga private Secondary School (Rhoda).

He underwent Jando ceremony during the past holiday in anticipation of a bash of f**king Mayaro only to be met by rebuffs and being snatched.

Ndimbuli good at downloading works to publish so-called books without acknowledging the source.

He watches Kolimba every Friday and relieves himself by kubunyula out of frustrations that he has been snatched and rebuffed.

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE EDITOR IN CHIEF

Rebuffed by a LA lady and wrote Chibaluwa Kwa mahope in Luwinga Focus and now in a nom du plume is still nursing the wounds through Mzuni in verse.

Booted out of seminary because of Kuphulitsa three girls in a space of a month.

He was caught red-handed bunyularing by a man of God (grace be upon him)

He was also notoriously known for raining obscenities at a Priest after a tot of Kachasu , yake ija amakonda ija.


ICHI MCHIYAMBI CHABE, HAMAS WILL ALWEZ HIT BACK WHENEVER NEED ARISE. BLOOD FOR BLOOD; RESISTANCE FOR VIOLENCE, SOMETIMES ITS GOOD TO FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE!!!

Posted by; The Congregation of the Defense of the Hamas Crew